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Someone stole 30,000 liters of glacier water from a vodka distillery Someone stole 30,000 liters of glacier water from a vodka distillery

Iceberg Vodka, a Toronto-based vodka distillery, recently discovered the theft of 30,000 liters (7925.1616 gallons) of iceberg water from a secure tank. According to The Drinks Business, police estimate the value of the water to be between $9,000 and $12,000 Canadian dollars ($6,791.13-$9,055.64 USD,…

Oh great, Jägermeister wants to give away shots in airports  Oh great, Jägermeister wants to give away shots in airports 

Greetings from a person who recently flew from Chicago to Los Angeles on a plane next to a guy who was pretty damn drunk, here to report that the fine folks at Jägermeister are rolling out a campaign that involves giving people at airports free shots of the Jäg before said people board pointy metal tubes that soar…

Chrissy Teigen has taco ideas for Taco Bell Chrissy Teigen has taco ideas for Taco Bell

Chrissy Teigen is good at food stuff. She’s also good at Twitter. It should surprise no one, then, that she’s once again found away to combine the two, this time passing along a couple notes to the people of Taco Bell. One is just sensible, and the other is something we’re maybe into which also sent us down a Guy…

Tonight, Brooklyn Nine-Nine does this to Rosa Diaz’s hair Tonight, Brooklyn Nine-Nine does this to Rosa Diaz’s hair

Here’s what’s happening in the world of television for Thursday, February 14. All times are Eastern.

Pineapple on pizza is delicious and I will gladly die on this hill Pineapple on pizza is delicious and I will gladly die on this hill

A YouGov survey has found that 24 percent of Americans believe that pineapple is one of the worst toppings you can put on a pizza. A survey of me, sitting here in front of my computer in comfy pants, has found that 100 percent of those people are wrong, because pineapple on pizza is amazing.

Connecticut ballpark becomes first in nation to ban peanuts Connecticut ballpark becomes first in nation to ban peanuts

Dunkin’ Donuts Park, a minor league baseball stadium in Hartford, Connecticut, has completely banned peanuts, a move the organization claims makes it the first to do so in the United States. It’s the latest instance in a growing trend of eliminating peanuts from public spaces. Insert your own “and Cracker Jack” joke…

Take me down to the very Weird City Take me down to the very Weird City

Here’s what’s happening in the world of television for Wednesday, February 13. All times are Eastern.  

Man sues Burger King for revoked "free food for life" promise made after bathroom mishap [UPDATED] Man sues Burger King for revoked "free food for life" promise made after bathroom mishap [UPDATED]

Updated Feb. 12, 2019: Willamette Week is reporting a satisfying, juicy, Whopper-of-a-conclusion to this story: The lawyer for Curtis Brooner announced that Burger King has agreed to settle the lawsuit with his client for $9,026, or the cost of a Whopper meal every week for the next 22 years. According to WW, Portland…

This Is Us spends some more time on “Songbird Road” This Is Us spends some more time on “Songbird Road”

Here’s what’s happening in the world of television for Tuesday, February 12. All times are Eastern.

Portland grocery stores run out of kale ahead of big snowstorm Portland grocery stores run out of kale ahead of big snowstorm

The Pacific Northwest is powering through a series of no-joke snowstorms right now. These storms aren’t of the sort that are intense for Portland and Seattle but make Chicagoans roll their eyes, but actually intense. So the fine people of the region spent their weekends buying a bunch of food like miserly dragons that…

The hammer comes down on I Am The Night The hammer comes down on I Am The Night

Here’s what’s happening in the world of television for Monday, February 11. All times are Eastern.

This Is 40... clove garlic chicken This Is 40... clove garlic chicken

Welcome to The Takeout’s Garlic Week, our Valentine to the world’s loveliest stink.

The Walking Dead shambles back onto the schedule, craving your eyes The Walking Dead shambles back onto the schedule, craving your eyes

Here’s what’s happening in the world of television for Sunday, February 10. All times are Eastern. 

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend gets surreal and subdued in a table-setting episode that’s so not a big deal  Crazy Ex-Girlfriend gets surreal and subdued in a table-setting episode that’s so not a big deal 

When you break down the events of Crazy Ex-Girlfriend in a dramatic sense, not that much happens. Four of the five big developments—Paula takes the bar, Rebecca discovers what her dream might be, Josh and Greg get in a fight, and Darryl meets someone new—each have an element that eliminates or lessens the drama or the…

Wait, so how did they make a 2nd season of Big Little Lies? Wait, so how did they make a 2nd season of Big Little Lies?

This post discusses the plot of Big Little Lies.

Ian McKellen owns a pub and might join your pub quiz team Ian McKellen owns a pub and might join your pub quiz team

There’s a three-headed nugget of pure delight to be found within this roundup, from The Drinks Business, of famous people who own pubs. It is this: Sir Ian McKellen owns a pub called The Grapes; it used to be Charles Dickens’ local; and the Sir will sometimes show up to play—or run—the bar’s pub quiz.

Aldi invites us to “Take On Brie” with cheeses named for sick ’80s jams Aldi invites us to “Take On Brie” with cheeses named for sick ’80s jams

The 61st Annual Grammy Awards will air on Sunday, sans Ariana Grande, and if you can’t get your cheese via “Thank U, Next,” you’ll have to get it from somewhere else. Like Aldi!

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend takes 20 mg of La La Land in this exclusive clip from tonight’s episode

“You have toughed it own for a long time on your own here,” Jay Hayden’s Dr. Shin (a.k.a. Dr. Daaaaamn) says to Rebecca Bunch (Rachel Bloom) near the end of last week’s excellent Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. Then he rips a page from his prescription pad and adds, “And you don’t have to.” That’s the first major step in Crazy…

Campbell’s trademarks “chunky,” all other soups now “lumpy” and “with large bits” Campbell’s trademarks “chunky,” all other soups now “lumpy” and “with large bits”

Updated, Feb. 7, 2:00 p.m.: A Campbell’s spokesperson reached out to The Takeout to make clear: “There is not an issue with non-prominent, descriptive uses of ‘chunky’ that aren’t a trademark or brand name, therefore we would not object to brands using the word to describe a particular variety of soup.”

Taco Bell delivers Taco Bell delivers

Some changes feel so destined, so right, so inevitable and correct that once they happen, it’s the old way that seems strange and foreign. You meet the right person. You adopt the perfect pet. You get bangs. And now, you order a Cheesy Gordita Crunch and two things of Nacho Fries at 1 a.m. Is it the first time, or…

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