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Excellent Baseball Man Decorates Hat With Live Bird

Yesterday Jesus Cruz of the Peoria Chiefs was strolling to the dugout after a successful start when he was met—attacked?—by a small bird. Unflustered, Cruz made the most of the moment, by capturing the little fellow and turning him into a brief but bold fashion statement:

Magi Came From The East Upon Seeing Jesus’s Star; Tim Tebow Is An Eastern League All-Star Magi Came From The East Upon Seeing Jesus’s Star; Tim Tebow Is An Eastern League All-Star

Binghamton Rumble Ponies outfielder Tim Tebow, a 30-year-old man who has admirably persisted in his dream of playing professional sports for a living, has earned himself a small token of success by being named to the Eastern League All-Star Game. Tebow has only batted .261 all season, but heated up enough in the month…

The Cotton Candy Hot Dog Will Kill Us All The Cotton Candy Hot Dog Will Kill Us All

If you haven’t eaten breakfast or lunch yet today, it may be exceedingly difficult to do so now. Over the weekend, the Erie Seawolves, the Double-A affiliate of the Detroit Tigers, unveiled a special product for their Sugar Rush Night. It is the kind of special anti-treat that you will never be able to unsee but will…

Italian Heritage Group Manages To Get Offended By Minor League "Pizza Rats" Promotion Italian Heritage Group Manages To Get Offended By Minor League "Pizza Rats" Promotion

The Class-A Staten Island Yankees have one of the cleverest and most well-regarded promotions this season, as they occasionally rebrand themselves as the Staten Island Pizza Rats. It celebrates the 2015 viral video of a subway rat who likes pizza, and acknowledges a 2016 fan vote to change the team’s name. The name…

Oh No, Vlad Jr.'s Injury Timeline Is Expanding Oh No, Vlad Jr.'s Injury Timeline Is Expanding

The Blue Jays put gentle dinger machine Vladimir Guerrero Jr. on the 7-day disabled list last weekend after he tweaked a leg injury on a dipshit single on Saturday. It was a tough blow, but we are grownups, and we can survive seven days without our strong dong-mashing idol. It has now been seven days—where is Young…

All Routine Groundouts Should Look Like This

When you’ve reached the “playing for the Salt Lake Bees” point of your baseball career, it’s perfectly reasonable to have some fun with it. Eric Young Jr., erstwhile MLB speedster and veteran of 610 big league games over nine seasons, showed how this was done in a game on Sunday.

These Minor League Baseball Team Name Nominees Sound Like Bathroom Euphemisms These Minor League Baseball Team Name Nominees Sound Like Bathroom Euphemisms

A minor league baseball team in Amarillo, Texas is selecting a new name among five candidates. Local news outlet Myhighplains.com noted that the choices “all sound like the makings of a popular country song.” Yes, but only if that song were about doing a doo-doo, because that’s what these options call to mind. These…

Oh Nothing, Just Another Mighty Walk-Off Dinger From Vladimir Guerrero Jr. 

The New Hampshire Fisher Cats entered the bottom of the seventh* inning Sunday down 5-3 to the Binghamton Rumble Ponies. The very brink of a loss! Whatever would they do? Whosoever could save them from these dire circumstances?

Please Just Call Up Vladimir Guerrero Jr., He's Too Good For The Minor Leagues Please Just Call Up Vladimir Guerrero Jr., He's Too Good For The Minor Leagues

Truly I say to you today: Double-A ball offers no challenge to Vladimir Guerrero Jr. besides that of a blank canvas upon which he can paint wild highlights. The 19-year-old slugger has spent his time with the New Hampshire Fisher Cats smacking big dingers and generally looking like he belongs at a higher level, and…

Idiot Snake On The Field Pays Ultimate Price For Love Of Baseball

In the eighth inning of a San Antonio Missions Double-A game Friday night, a true baseball loving snake invaded the outfield and began making his way towards the infield, no doubt in search of the best possible view of the night’s action. Unfortunately, for his curiosity and enthusiasm for America’s pastime, the sweet…

Vlad Guerrero Jr. Smacked A Long Dinger And That's Not Even The Best Part Of The Video Vlad Guerrero Jr. Smacked A Long Dinger And That's Not Even The Best Part Of The Video

Toronto Blue Jays prospect Vlad Guerrero Jr. smacked a massive tater Thursday night that sailed clear out of the stadium in Double-A Binghamton. We’ve seen Vladito hit some major dongs already in his still very young career, but the audio on this particular big fly gives it a little something extra.

Twins Minor-Leaguer Pulls Off The Hidden-Ball Trick

Bases-loaded jams can be tense, but Jermaine Curtis of the Rochester Red Wings found it to be the best opportunity to clown a baserunner. The Twins’ Triple-A affiliate was down 4-3 to the Charlotte Knights in the fourth inning Tuesday when Curtis tested out the hidden-ball trick on Kevan Smith, who took one step off…

The Cruel Bill Allowing MLB To Keep Screwing Over Minor-Leaguers Is Now Law The Cruel Bill Allowing MLB To Keep Screwing Over Minor-Leaguers Is Now Law

President Donald Trump signed the $1.3 trillion omnibus spending bill into law today, just hours after he threatened to veto it. That avoids a government shutdown and does a whole lot of other things, too, but the portion most directly relevant to professional sports is the Save America’s Pastime Act, which secures…

Congress Is Likely Getting Ready To Legalize The Underpayment Of Minor League Baseball Players Congress Is Likely Getting Ready To Legalize The Underpayment Of Minor League Baseball Players

The national spending bill that’s expected to pass later Congress this week includes a provision exempting minor-league baseball players from labor standards—meaning that paying players paltry wages would go from being an incredibly stupid tradition to being codified in federal law.

Minor League Baseball's New Extra Innings Format Turns The Rulebook Into Nonsense Minor League Baseball's New Extra Innings Format Turns The Rulebook Into Nonsense

A few weeks after Major League Baseball announced a series of surface-level rule changes aimed at improving pace of play, Minor League Baseball has announced that it’ll start experimenting with something more significant. During extra-inning games this season, a runner will automatically be placed on second base to…

Yankees Prospect Shot In Hip During Alleged Robbery Attempt Yankees Prospect Shot In Hip During Alleged Robbery Attempt

Yankees minor leaguer Thairo Estrada was shot in his right hip last week in Venezuela during what he says was a botched robbery at a restaurant. Manager Aaron Boone said he was recovering quickly, and should be available for the “bulk of the season.”

Derby The Very Good Bat Dog Has Died Derby The Very Good Bat Dog Has Died

Derby, Team Bat Dog for the double-A Trenton Thunder, has died of cancer at nine years old. Derby was a beloved member of the Thunder, and he began his retrieving apprenticeship in 2008 under his father Chase. Even as his face got all gray, Derby continued to do his thing and go pick up bats. Thunder GM Jeff Hurley …

Las Vegas Sneakily Gave Away $80 Million For A New Triple-A Stadium Las Vegas Sneakily Gave Away $80 Million For A New Triple-A Stadium

If you read the press release announcing the construction of a new ballpark out in Summerlin, Nev. for the Las Vegas 51s, you might have thought that the construction would mercifully be completed without use of public money. The Raiders’ stadium deal is the worst heist in American history, and one may have thought…

Brewers Prospect Bubba Derby Opens Up About Escape From Las Vegas Massacre Brewers Prospect Bubba Derby Opens Up About Escape From Las Vegas Massacre

Bubba Derby is a minor-league pitcher in the Brewers system, and he was at the Route 91 Harvest Festival in Las Vegas when Stephen Paddock opened fire on the crowd, killing at least 59 people. Derby was at the festival with several family members and friends, and he’s since detailed the terrifying experience of being…

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